Blog Series: Tips for a successful First Date: Tip #5

Tip #5 – Don’t be a douche, make the call!

This last tip really doesn’t have to do with the mechanics of the first date.  This tip is how to prevent someone from thinking you are a total douche.  Remember earlier, in the Tip #2 about cell phones, I alluded to the fact that you don’t know who your date knows?  Well, that comes back here – in the follow up.

So, the first date is over and a night of sleep has rested your brain after the excitement of the first date.  Did you have a good time?  Was the evening just awful?  Was the night pleasant, but you just didn’t feel the chemistry?  However the date went, the day after requires a follow up.  Even if you know there is no chance of anything further, you owe the guy a follow up.  Now, this is my strongest piece of advice for all my brothers out there:  GROW A PAIR AND BE A MAN!  If you don’t want to call your date because you didn’t have a good time and you don’t want to face it…well…you are a pussy and don’t deserve to find happiness at all! There is some jest in that, but really, if you aren’t going to be a man about dating, don’t date.  The follow up is about character and in a community as small as ours, people talk and you will be found out by your actions.

The person you took out on a date, or who took you out on a date, is a human being and has feelings.  We have all had that person that we met and when we followed up with a text they either A) didn’t answer or B) answer so shortly that you knew what was up.  Don’t be that jackass.  Treat the person with respect and let them you know that you appreciated their time and enjoyed the conversation.  If you didn’t, at least thank them for having dinner with you.

Now, the best way to follow up is a phone call.  The least favorable methods would be text or email.  Here is a good script if you want to try a second date:

“Hey, had a blast last night.  If you would like to go out again, I definitely would be interested.”

See not too eager, it puts the ball in their court and it shows interest.  However, if you don’t want a second date, try this:

“Thanks for having dinner with me.”

Easy, nice and it shows some human decency and doesn’t even hint at a second date.

Yes, they may ask if there is any interest on your part.  That happens.  If it does, be honest and be kind.  You don’t have to be a jerk to get your point across.  And remember, in the game of dating you may be the one who gets the very rude, short end of the stick.  How would you want to be treated?

 This concludes my Blog Series on successful first dates.  I hope you enjoyed it and I hope you might have learned something.  If so, invite me to the wedding!!!

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2 thoughts on “Blog Series: Tips for a successful First Date: Tip #5

  1. ehhh i disagree… kind of. every first date i have been on in the last year was followed up by a text moments after the date ended… that gives me a free pass on not calling the next day…. but i am still a total douche

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